5 Beachgoers You'll Run Into and Away From

Posted on 11 July 2015

Beach fashion pretty much requires that all normal dress codes are shredded, burned, and very much forgotten. When you’re playing in the sand, everything goes and everything shows. So throw out those shorts, it’s time to thong it up (guys and girls). Might want to dab a little sunscreen on those milky white winter thighs though. Otherwise, you’ll be walking to the sandbar on pair of hot dogs.

There are a several types of fashion friendlies you’ll find on the beach. Not everyone can look as perfect as Tallboys.

1. Muscle beachers

muscle beach

Favorite beach activity: Flexing really, really hard.

Tan level: Don't care. As long as I'm oiled up.

Swimwear: Weightlifting belt.

2. Selfie stick shore walkers

hot girl selfie stick beach


Favorite beach activity: Capturing every grain of sand on camera for my followers.

Tan level: Darker than my Space Gray iPhone 6 Plus.

Swimwear: Sunglasses ... followers can't see me from the neck down.

3. Sandcastle geniuses

sand castle beach sand genius da vinci

Favorite beach activity: Being an inspiration to every 5-year-old with a plastic red pail and shovel.

Tan level: Sandy.

Swimwear: I look homeless.

4. Surfer dudes and dudets

surfer dude

Favorite beach activity: Going tubular, man.

Tan level: My full body spandex suit acts as SPF 1,000,000.

Swimwear: I go au naturel under the suit ... just like Batman.

5. Burn and turners

 tan lines beach sun tanning feet


Favorite beach activity: Not missing a spot.

Tan level: Crispy like a burnt potato chip.

Swimwear: Nothing so I don't miss a spot.

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